Picture taken from here
If you have read my blog long enough, you would have known my style of writing. I don't like to talk about work, as when I do want to talk about it, more often than not, it would normally be a negative or unhappy posts. As much as I loathe writing about it, once in a while I think I need to jot it down just to released it from my body system. Talked about it with hubby, talked about it with my BFF (siap nangis!) kesian dia kena mendengar sambil disampuk oleh anak dia yg cute tu :). Lagi satu BFF yg aku berani call sambil nangis pun sudah berada jauh di UK. Sob..sob.
Tapi nak cerita pun tak bleh cerita full, nanti kena saman plak unless I make my blog private, which I have yet to consider. Aku pernah baca tau domain blog apa tah, yg certain post dia bleh lock with password..so sapa yg ada password je bleh baca and tak payahla privatize the whole blog. Hmmm..
I'm in a very depressed state right now. Allah je la yg tahu. It has been hell for the past 3-4 months but I put a brave face in the office. I sometimes wept on my way back from work, while driving. Sometimes in the LRT, tapi takut plak org ingat aku nangis sbb tak dpt duduk, so lap cepat2 :).
I've written about it here and here. Latest update on it is that I have to wait for the offer letter as they'll be restructuring and wanted me to come onboard bila restructuring tu dah diapprove. I shall expect the offer letter this week or latest mid of Feb. Aku tak tahan dah nak tunggu sbb I really want to know and decide whether it's worth it to leave or find another job soonest possible. I do have to give 2 months notice, the longest ever in my career which make it more depressing.
Yer, nasihat kawan2 ialah:
~ Cari keje baru or
~ Buang ego dan tanya bila bleh dpt offer letter or
~ Anggap my new place/position/transfer ni as a recognition (bukan promoted pun bro) and as new challenge
Easier said than done sebenarnya. Really. Susah nak explain. Sometimes bila aku nak meluah rasa, aku tak minta solution pun, tak minta kawan2 crack your head to think what I should do. I just want to talk/cry and for a friend to listen..just listening.
I know I should remain positive all the time, but I'm only human with flaws. Aku tak percaya ada org bleh remain postive or happy like ALL the time ok, surely at one point, mesti akan break down. *sigh* But I've learnt my lesson kut, pasni kalau rasa down lagi, baik la nyusahkan B and Mama je utk dengar, takpun telan sendiri je.
On another note, I've made application at the EPF to withdraw money from my Account 2 so that I can use it for my monthly house installments. It has been approved and after 5 days, the money is in. Yeay. Will be using the money to pay house loan for the next 24 months. Our plan is, every month still tepikan duit gaji as if paying for monthly installment, sbb nak kumpul duit for house renovation and also nak pi jalan jauh sket *jeling kat Intan Lily*.
House renovation tu utk luar rumah. Dlm rumah,insyallah takde apa dah nak renovate, cukupla apa yg ada. Abis2 pun ada some places nak touch up dgn cat je. Yg kat luar ni, angan2 we all (angan2 aku la sebenarnya) nak buat gate letrik, buang beam, bumbung porch baru and tiles porch so that both cars bleh park dekat porch. Angan2 la dulu..dah cukup duit nanti insyallah termakbul. Bila? Jgn tanya hehe.
Apa lagi ye? For this coming long weekend (setahun sekali je org keje KL nak berlagak!), I had organized two events. Steamboat BBQ for friends on Saturday and karaoke for cousins on Sunday. Tengok la nanti turnout macam mana. Sket ke banyak ke, I wanna have fun!